written by leah drinen (soulremedies.net)

Needing to breathe – Photography by TrevorDrinen

i am the sort of person who does not like buttons, not the wearable sort (though i don’t like those either, come to think of it!). i like dials and switches, looms and needles, scissors and glue, my knife and my drill, but not buttons. computers, modern telephones, radios, and home appliances, anything that requires the pushing of the right buttons, i have an aversion to.

i’m not sure what causes this, but i have a sneaking suspicion, it has to do with control.

if i don’t turn it, can’t manipulate it with my  hands, if i can’t put my energy into it, but have to wait for it to do what i’ve asked, i’m forced to hold my breath and wait. i was twenty-something before i noticed: when i hold my breath i inevitably get angry.

but i’ve found ways of tricking myself into breathing while i sit at my computer.

soon after returning to hawaii, my daughter got staph infection. this very tenacious sort of flesh eating bacteria evolved in hospitals where the bug, or shall i say the beast, was in constant contact with antibacterial substances which it eventually outsmarted. send that bug out into the world, watch out!  i eventually turned to the use of essential oils as medicine. for eons plants have lived very close quarters with bacteria and the like. so they have learned a few million tricks or two over the ages. they are fighters.  and they can fight for us too!

next to my computer, i have a simple cold air diffuser. when i come down to my computer i turn it on, add essential oil if necessary, and set to work. as i go about pushing the buttons and waiting, working, waiting again, the gentle scent reminds me to breathe, calming yet invigorating; and of course, there are hundreds of them. so the practice never grows old.

every now and again i bring the diffuser up stairs to tend to one of our family members needs. whether it is for disgruntled brothers, my own need for comfort, or my littlest child’s respiration, therapeutic grade essential oils ease our way. they are one of the beautiful things that give, more than they take.

if i go back to my computer without my beloved gadget, after less than ten minutes, i wear out quickly, getting aggravated or nauseous. then it’s watch out for mama as i go about trying to bring myself back into real life, real time and the realities of being in my body.

keeping present is a challenge these days. constant communication is so enticing. we don’t anymore really have to be where we are! only what happens, if we want to be, or need to be? precious memories aren’t often made on-line. and the strongest bonds we have with each other are made when all five of our senses are engaged.

staying present can be so painful when experiencing loss or trauma. breathing can seem impossible.

i think our most profound and shaping moments come when our breath is either quickened or taken away. but there’s no two ways about it, moving forward requires breath.

feel what you must, cry, whatever,

just find a way to breathe.

:product notes: 

look for therapeutic grade 100% pure essential oils. unfortunately they are not likely to be found at your local health food store! i’ve tried a handful of the top brands and found young living to be tops.

learn more here
meet some of my favs
this one i use for going out 
this one i use for courage in the morning
this one when i’m freaking out
this one i use for crying
this one for lovemaking
this one to unify myself

did you know? when we yawn it is because our bodies are too tired to regulate the breath.